Turkeys

No, this is not a post about Jive Turkeys, stopping things "cold turkey" or the freshman "turkey drop." This is a post about actual live turkeys in the wild. 

Last spring when we moved in, I frequently saw flocks of turkeys on our land. Usually it was a group of hens walking along. Sometimes it was a Tom and his flock of hens out foraging together. Invariably they followed the path into or out of the woods across from our house, the mown path through the hay that runs from the upper barn down to the lake, or a portion of our long gravel lane. Even the deer and coyote are spotted on the same routes. I guess the path of least resistance is taken by all creatures, not just humans.

But ever since the hunting season for turkey last year, I've only seen solitary hens at our place. I see them walking down the hay field path when the hay is high (or rather, I see their heads above the hay.) I see them frustratedly following the mowed strip along the board fence, seemingly unable to duck under or fly over. I see them running willy nilly on our lawn along the edge of the woods in a fluster. 

I'm not much of a hunting advocate. In fact, I'm pretty anti-gun. But there is a little bitty part of me that thinks it would be pretty apropos to bag a wild turkey for Thanksgiving dinner some year. (I know the overall population is fine because I've seen plenty of gobblers and their flocks as I drive to town and back.) 

My husband just wants us to raise our own Thanksgiving bird. I suppose, as weird as that seems to me, that would be pretty satisfying too. After all, whole, organically raised turkeys cost a small fortune just before Thanksgiving. And we usually have a houseful of guests for Thanksgiving dinner, so we get a large bird. It would feel mildly fulfilling to be so old fashioned and frugal.  

But I can see how that would quickly lead to a Christmas Goose, and then where would it stop?! :) Soon we'd be buying feeder cows and spring pigs. And then, why not raise a flock of meat chickens instead of just layers?

Right now a big sticking point is that my kids don't want to raise anything that will eventually be butchered. They want fiber animals like sheep and alpaca. They want milk animals like goats and cows. They don't even mind egg layers, since we've never eaten fertilized eggs. But they are citified enough to desire only dissected, sorted, prepackaged meat that comes in cellophane in neat stacks at the store. I sympathize with them. How removed from the reality of food our modern American culture is! 

The other challenge is that we haven't managed to engineer a predator-proof chicken coop yet, so right now there's no way we could secure a turkey. Also, I'm not sure if my husband is up for slaughtering a turkey. He thinks he could do it. But I sure don't think I could. Shoot a turkey 20 feet away- yes. Stick a turkey in a "killing cone" and do the business- no. I think I'd reenact a version of the scene from "Son in Law." And if he manages to present me with a bird, that means I'd have to pluck... and other yucky stuff. :)